Posted on September 20, 2014
“My heart is a bit sad that I have so much anxiety about introducing the person that I love to this place and he is so insecure.”
DG: It sounds like you are well aware of and have, perhaps, contributed to the magic of Smoke Farm. Perhaps this is where your anxiety comes from – that Smoke Farm is a physical manifestation of what you hold dear and how horrible it might be if your love is not sensitive to how special and important this place is. What would that mean?
I offer this: Schedule a date to go sit in the travel section of your favorite bookstore together. Take time to pour through the books that attract you. Daydream together about going to a place that neither of you have been. Figure out how you can save and plan to make your dream come true. This may take several dates. Once you have a plan, or before, share how you felt at Smoke Farm and that you look forward to creating an “our spot”.
Token: Here is a small vial of Smoke Farm. Let it reassure you that this place, and any other you love, are yours and will continue to nurture you always.
“I have fallen in love with somebody I cannot be with. I do not know how to be content in my own life anymore.”
DG: Could it be that you have not spent enough time nurturing yourself and that has fostered this feeling if ill content? “Falling in love” with people we cannot be with is sometimes a powerful tool we employ to distract us from our true heartache which stems from not loving ourselves better. I offer this: Make a commitment to taking yourself, and only yourself, on a date to your favorite bookstore followed by take out from your favorite restaurant. While at the bookstore, visit the magazine section. Walk through and pick up any magazine that interests you for any reason. Take that stack and whittle it down to the ones that inspire you to take some action. Purchase those. Take your stack and your take out home, get in your jammies and go through page by glossy page. Tear things out, ear mark others, make notes in permanent ink – whatever feel good to you. Now go through the things you’ve marked. Choose exactly one and allow it to be the impetus for an activity that you will do by yourself, for yourself. It does not matter if you think you can do this thing. It does not matter if it seems impossible or too simple or silly or too expensive or shameful or whatever. Make the commitment that you will see this thing through. Every step you take toward the accomplishment of this thing is an act of tremendous love for you.
Token: Here is a pen to take some notes.